waffle fry announcement possibilities

ideas on what could be happening March 4:

• federal ban on sex with potato products lifted
• every order of waffle fries comes with 2 valiums and a pair of mittens
• thanksgiving is repealed/march 4 becomes a holiday instead/declared 'waffle fries day'
• it is revealed that waffle fries are the keys to heaven and only those who have eaten them are allowed in.
• low-calorie waffle fries are debuted, regular waffle fries stay on menu with instructions on how to purge them typed on back of packaging (so as to stay thin)
• obama appoints the first-ever waffle fry to serve in his cabinet
• waffle fry milkshakes introduced
• chick fil a announces the next phase in waffle fry history, the belgian waffle fries.